Thoughtless Therapy

 So my husband started "therapy". Of course its not one who specializes in anger management, impulse control, porn addiction, abusive behavior etc.. Anxiety, depression and addiction with focus on adhd. Because hes latching onto adhd as an excuse for his piss poor behavior and lack of integrity and empathy. He had his 2nd session yesterday. Or you could call it his latest manipulation plan. He's doing virtual visits so he's in his room for his sessions. I don't pay attention. After his session however he came out and told me his therapist thinks we should list our love languages on a piece of paper and blah blah. I say blah because my head went blank at this audacity. And i have no doubt she said this. Subtly manipulated by my husband who instead of concentrating on his problems is deflecting to some warped combined responsibility. And this 'therapist' has not even delved into his psyche and is certainly not privy to whats gone on in our marriage. And if he did tell her he has cheated multiple times what kind of subpar therapist thinks love language is applicable at session 2? In a marriage which she is only seeing one party. Nor should he be set up by his individual counselor to tell me what to do. The audacity just plain pissed me off. I told him shes not my therapist and she's not our marriage counselor. I didn't say it but at this point I shouldn't even be in the conversation yet as they are supposed to be working on him! I wasnt friendly but I wasn't mean. But I was firm. Of course he got mad and said 'way to be open' and stomped off. My daughter told me it made sense - I never came out of my group or counselor and bossed him around with something they said - because I was working on me. Then she said it makes her mad because it could but won't help him because he lies. He told his counselor that I'm lazy. And that it doesn't really 'bother' him but he doesn't say it in the 'nicest' way. She said it pisses her off because what he really does is scream at me that I'm lazy and useless. Not that I need to defend myself but his basis of my 'laziness' is that I don't work - or at least go to a job. But nothing would get cleaned, no cats/dogs/goats would be fed, no bills paid, no insurance taken care of, no college funding, no 4 bedrooms remodeled, no caulking on the roof, no trash taken out or picked up, no dishes done etc etc. And I worked outside the home for 6 years and have only been home since I was laid off due to covid. And I've made more money on unemployment and gotten more college aid to the tune of 5200.00 because of it as well. And a decent counselor would have recognized that thinking and calling your wife lazy is a red flag of disrespect. Probably should have delved more into that way of thinking. Ugh. I just don't want to deal with his lack of depth thinking hes doing something with this therapist that cant think but can quack.