I Cry Alone

Im sad...I prefer anger. Anger feels strong. Defiant. Resolved. Sadness feels weak. Resigned. Unresolved. My childhood was devoid of love. It was harsh and lonely. In spite of it when I met my husband I discovered I still had dreams. I could still love. I could trust. I believed in heroes. I could still believe in people. I am so incredibly sad sometimes its hard to explain...not for what my husbands done but for what he took from me...my trust, my dreams, my hopes my confidence. So I cry sometimes...alone. In the shower.. When no one is home. I cant share my sadness...how can he understand when he took so much from me? Im a cynic now. Thank goodness depression doesnt stick on me or I would always feel lost....as I do today.