Show Me the Meat

One thing I have learned from my narcissist abusive husband is that narcissists are never happy. They can be righteous. Angry. But nothing is ever enough and they remain dissatisfied. Most recently I have adjusted my routine to avoid the abusive wrath that doing nothing still seems to bring about. So in the mornings I try to remain in my room...if I'm lucky until he has left for work. He considers this a personal affront even though when I present myself in common living areas he verbally attacks without cause or reason. Indeed sometimes that happens even when I stay in my room. Yesterday was one such day. Over the weekend we went to the grocery store together. We didn't buy much. He didn't say much. My debit card is lost so I don't have a card or checkbook to purchase and he knows this. Monday morning I step out of my room...to the immediate onslaught of him going on about how wed on't have any lunch meat and he can't believe he has to go the fucking store before work. And if he'd known "we" weren't going the grocery store again he would have bought more...etc blah blah. The implication being that "I" didn't go to the store. He went into town...he's certainly old enough to go to the store. I hate it when he does but he still could have. I hate it because he buys lunch food and crap food (chips, candy, junk, cigarettes) spends over a 100 bucks and we still have nothing for dinner. But I digress...he still could have picked up lunch meat any time over the weekend - including when we shopped. But then what would be have bitched about for 5 minutes on a Monday morning? As a side note I also knocked a deer into next week with the front end of my car. Again I adjusted/controlled my actions to avoid instant abuse. In a normal marriage I would of course call my husband first seeking sympathy, empathy and concern. I knew my husband would just be mad. So I waited a couple hours and then texted him. I texted him because I figured he would have adjusted to the information by the time he got home and not be as angry. But he called...annoyed that the car might be damaged he only wanted to make sure it was driveable. He then complained about vehicle issues and then went back to work. So no...he did not ask or display any concern, empathy or regard for me as a person. A narcissist only thinks in terms of what affects them not others...whether its lunch meat or a car accident.